Emotional intelligence (EI) is quietly transforming how we build teams, grow businesses, and connect with others. Those who naturally notice subtle details about people often excel in relationships and leadership. Just like you’d scan the room during a pitch meeting to gauge body language or spot a hesitant “yes,” mastering these micro-observations can give you an edge in entrepreneurship.
Here’s the kicker: If you automatically pick up on eight specific small behaviors, you’re likely operating on a level of emotional intelligence most people struggle to reach. Let’s dive into what these details are, why they matter, and how noticing them can help you thrive in both professional and personal settings.
Eight Small Details Emotionally Intelligent People Notice
1. Incongruence Between Words and Body Language
When someone says, “I’m fine,” but their tone or posture says anything but, do you notice? High-EQ individuals immediately pick up on these conflicting signals. This skill is invaluable during negotiations or team discussions, where actions often speak louder than words.
To refine this, focus on nonverbal cues. Observe eye movement, face tensions, or even pauses in conversation. Tools like the FBI’s tips on decoding body language can sharpen this ability.
2. Subtle Shifts in Behavior
Whether it’s a usually chatty team member going quiet or a manager skipping their usual pre-meeting ritual, small inconsistencies matter. They might reveal stress or dissatisfaction. Entrepreneurs can use this to proactively address issues before they snowball.
3. Patterns in Interruptions
In any group conversation, high-EQ people watch who gets interrupted, and who interrupts. This often signals power dynamics. For instance, if a junior colleague consistently gets cut off, it could indicate workplace inequity. Correcting this fosters a healthier work culture, where no voice goes unheard.
4. Efforts to Mask Discomfort
Sometimes, people try too hard to appear unaffected. A strained laugh or overexplaining a mistake can be signs they’re guarding their emotions. During client pitches or investor meetings, acknowledging this (with tact) can build trust.
5. Individuals Being Left Out
Noticing social exclusion at work or in events can make a huge difference. High-EQ entrepreneurs actively create inclusive spaces, ensuring all team members connect. Research from the Center for Talent Innovation shows that inclusive teams outperform their peers by 80% on market innovation.
6. Behavior That Escapes the Spotlight
High-EQ people often observe what’s happening in the background. For example, they notice the employee who quietly ensures the presentation slides align or the assistant who ensures everyone has coffee before meetings. These unnoticed actions often reveal loyalty and commitment.
7. Attempts at Hiding Vulnerability
Have you ever seen a colleague deflect a compliment or downplay a win? Many people struggle to show their pride or vulnerability. Observing this can help you provide encouragement that feels personal and genuine. In leadership, this builds rapport.
8. Performance Masking as Confidence
In the high-stakes environments entrepreneurs navigate, confidence sometimes gets replaced with rehearsed bravado. The difference? Authentic confidence invites collaboration, while performance erects walls. High-EQ individuals distinguish the two and adapt their response accordingly to sustain meaningful connections.
How to Develop This Skill
Sharpen Observations
Spend 10 minutes during any meeting noting physical behaviors, crossed arms, posture leaning in, etc. Reflect later: Were there disconnects between words and actions?
Practice Active Listening
Stop mentally preparing arguments during discussions. Focus entirely on what’s being shared. People are more likely to reveal their true thoughts when they feel genuinely heard.
Regular Feedback Loops
Ask for feedback on your listening or interpersonal skills. This not only enhances your EQ but also builds relational transparency.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
1. Overinterpreting Details
Not every crossed arm means defensiveness. Context is key. Be careful not to jump to conclusions prematurely.
2. Using Observations as Leverage
Emotional intelligence is about empathy, not manipulation. If you use your observations to exploit someone’s emotions, trust erodes quickly.
3. Ignoring This Skill in High-Pressure Scenarios
It’s easy to focus solely on your goals in tense moments. But those are the exact settings where your observations could make or break outcomes.
Practical Value for Entrepreneurs
Understanding and applying these traits improves decision-making, communication, and leadership skills. In my role, I’ve seen countless examples of businesses getting derailed (or supercharged) based on how tuned-in team members are to one another. Emotional intelligence doesn’t just help avoid missteps; it fosters deeper trust across every stakeholder relationship.
What’s your next step? Spend just one day consciously observing people around you. Noticing and responding to those unspoken signals could be your competitive advantage.
FAQ
1. What is emotional intelligence (EI) and why does it matter?
Emotional intelligence refers to the ability to recognize, understand, and manage your own emotions as well as the emotions of others. It is critical for personal and professional success, especially in building relationships, leadership, and decision-making. Learn more about the importance of emotional intelligence
2. How do emotionally intelligent individuals notice incongruent behavior?
Emotionally intelligent people can spot when someone's words don’t align with their body language. For instance, someone might say “I’m fine,” but their tense posture reveals otherwise. Explore the significance of nonverbal communication
3. Why is noticing changes in behavior patterns important?
Spotting changes in someone’s usual behavior, such as a normally talkative colleague becoming quiet, can signal underlying issues like stress. This awareness helps in timely intervention. Discover how behavior cues reveal emotional states
4. How does emotional intelligence help identify power dynamics in conversations?
High Emotional Intelligence allows people to observe who tends to interrupt and who gets interrupted, revealing workplace dynamics and enabling fairer discussions. Learn more about power dynamics and EQ
5. Can emotionally intelligent individuals identify discomfort in others?
Yes, high-EQ individuals notice subtle signs of discomfort like a strained laugh, fidgeting, or sudden topic changes. Acknowledging these cues can strengthen relationships. Read about Emotional Intelligence and masking emotions
6. How can noticing social exclusion make a difference?
Emotionally intelligent people recognize when someone is being left out and strive to create inclusive environments, which improves team cohesion and innovation outcomes. Learn about the impact of inclusion on performance
7. What is “performance masking” and how does it relate to emotional intelligence?
Performance masking occurs when confidence is feigned rather than genuine. Emotionally intelligent people spot this and foster an environment where authenticity flourishes.
8. How do high-EQ individuals respond to vulnerability?
They are attuned to subtle signs of vulnerability, such as deflecting compliments or downplaying achievements, and offer support in a way that feels genuine.
9. How can someone develop emotional intelligence?
To develop emotional intelligence, focus on enhancing active listening, observing nonverbal cues, practicing empathy, and seeking regular feedback on social interactions. Explore tips to develop emotional intelligence skills
10. What is the practical value of emotional intelligence for entrepreneurs?
For entrepreneurs, emotional intelligence enhances decision-making, builds trust, improves team dynamics, and helps navigate high-stakes scenarios effectively, giving them a competitive edge. Discover why emotional intelligence matters in entrepreneurship
About the Author
Violetta Bonenkamp, also known as MeanCEO, is an experienced startup founder with an impressive educational background including an MBA and four other higher education degrees. She has over 20 years of work experience across multiple countries, including 5 years as a solopreneur and serial entrepreneur. Throughout her startup experience she has applied for multiple startup grants at the EU level, in the Netherlands and Malta, and her startups received quite a few of those. She’s been living, studying and working in many countries around the globe and her extensive multicultural experience has influenced her immensely.
Violetta Bonenkamp's expertise in CAD sector, IP protection and blockchain
Violetta Bonenkamp is recognized as a multidisciplinary expert with significant achievements in the CAD sector, intellectual property (IP) protection, and blockchain technology.
CAD Sector:
- Violetta is the CEO and co-founder of CADChain, a deep tech startup focused on developing IP management software specifically for CAD (Computer-Aided Design) data. CADChain addresses the lack of industry standards for CAD data protection and sharing, using innovative technology to secure and manage design data.
- She has led the company since its inception in 2018, overseeing R&D, PR, and business development, and driving the creation of products for platforms such as Autodesk Inventor, Blender, and SolidWorks.
- Her leadership has been instrumental in scaling CADChain from a small team to a significant player in the deeptech space, with a diverse, international team.
IP Protection:
- Violetta has built deep expertise in intellectual property, combining academic training with practical startup experience. She has taken specialized courses in IP from institutions like WIPO and the EU IPO.
- She is known for sharing actionable strategies for startup IP protection, leveraging both legal and technological approaches, and has published guides and content on this topic for the entrepreneurial community.
- Her work at CADChain directly addresses the need for robust IP protection in the engineering and design industries, integrating cybersecurity and compliance measures to safeguard digital assets.
Blockchain:
- Violetta’s entry into the blockchain sector began with the founding of CADChain, which uses blockchain as a core technology for securing and managing CAD data.
- She holds several certifications in blockchain and has participated in major hackathons and policy forums, such as the OECD Global Blockchain Policy Forum.
- Her expertise extends to applying blockchain for IP management, ensuring data integrity, traceability, and secure sharing in the CAD industry.
Violetta is a true multiple specialist who has built expertise in Linguistics, Education, Business Management, Blockchain, Entrepreneurship, Intellectual Property, Game Design, AI, SEO, Digital Marketing, cyber security and zero code automations. Her extensive educational journey includes a Master of Arts in Linguistics and Education, an Advanced Master in Linguistics from Belgium (2006-2007), an MBA from Blekinge Institute of Technology in Sweden (2006-2008), and an Erasmus Mundus joint program European Master of Higher Education from universities in Norway, Finland, and Portugal (2009).
She is the founder of Fe/male Switch, a startup game that encourages women to enter STEM fields, and also leads CADChain, and multiple other projects like the Directory of 1,000 Startup Cities with a proprietary MeanCEO Index that ranks cities for female entrepreneurs. Violetta created the "gamepreneurship" methodology, which forms the scientific basis of her startup game. She also builds a lot of SEO tools for startups. Her achievements include being named one of the top 100 women in Europe by EU Startups in 2022 and being nominated for Impact Person of the year at the Dutch Blockchain Week. She is an author with Sifted and a speaker at different Universities. Recently she published a book on Startup Idea Validation the right way: from zero to first customers and beyond, launched a Directory of 1,500+ websites for startups to list themselves in order to gain traction and build backlinks and is building MELA AI to help local restaurants in Malta get more visibility online.
For the past several years Violetta has been living between the Netherlands and Malta, while also regularly traveling to different destinations around the globe, usually due to her entrepreneurial activities. This has led her to start writing about different locations and amenities from the POV of an entrepreneur. Here’s her recent article about the best hotels in Italy to work from.
About the Publication
Fe/male Switch is an innovative startup platform designed to empower women entrepreneurs through an immersive, game-like experience. Founded in 2020 during the pandemic "without any funding and without any code," this non-profit initiative has evolved into a comprehensive educational tool for aspiring female entrepreneurs.The platform was co-founded by Violetta Shishkina-Bonenkamp, who serves as CEO and one of the lead authors of the Startup News branch.
Mission and Purpose
Fe/male Switch Foundation was created to address the gender gap in the tech and entrepreneurship space. The platform aims to skill-up future female tech leaders and empower them to create resilient and innovative tech startups through what they call "gamepreneurship". By putting players in a virtual startup village where they must survive and thrive, the startup game allows women to test their entrepreneurial abilities without financial risk.
Key Features
The platform offers a unique blend of news, resources,learning, networking, and practical application within a supportive, female-focused environment:
- Skill Lab: Micro-modules covering essential startup skills
- Virtual Startup Building: Create or join startups and tackle real-world challenges
- AI Co-founder (PlayPal): Guides users through the startup process
- SANDBOX: A testing environment for idea validation before launch
- Wellness Integration: Virtual activities to balance work and self-care
- Marketplace: Buy or sell expert sessions and tutorials
Impact and Growth
Since its inception, Fe/male Switch has shown impressive growth:
- 5,000+ female entrepreneurs in the community
- 100+ startup tools built
- 5,000+ pieces of articles and news written
- 1,000 unique business ideas for women created
Partnerships
Fe/male Switch has formed strategic partnerships to enhance its offerings. In January 2022, it teamed up with global website builder Tilda to provide free access to website building tools and mentorship services for Fe/male Switch participants.
Recognition
Fe/male Switch has received media attention for its innovative approach to closing the gender gap in tech entrepreneurship. The platform has been featured in various publications highlighting its unique "play to learn and earn" model.